August 16th – the day that I’ve been waiting for since December 13, 2016. Today is the day that I get to meet the person that I’ve thought about every moment of every single day for the past nine months. Today… is my due date!
For those of you who don’t already know, I’m pregnant and due any day now with who I know is going to be the most perfect little boy. Since I’m writing this post on July 6th, it’s quite possible that I’ve already met him. Maybe I’m at the hospital right now… who knows! What I do know, though, is that right now I’m more anxious and nervous and excited than I’ve ever been, all while being the happiest I’ve ever been.
Everyone has a bucket list, right? I have some of the typical items on my list like sky diving, travelling, getting married, buying a house, getting to the point of being debt-free, learning to play guitar etc., but my number one has always been to be a mom. Being a mom to me is the ultimate dream. The idea of doing laundry all hours of the day, having my normal day-to-day outfit be jogging pants with an oversized t-shirt and a messy bun, not sleeping for more than two hours through the night, taking 30 minutes to grab a bag of milk from the corner store as opposed to the 5 minutes it takes now… all of these things are, in my mind, what make up the perfect life.
I know I sound crazy. I’ve been told multiple times in the past few months. It doesn’t make any sense to some people that I’m ready to completely dedicate my life at the age of 24 to caring for and unconditionally loving this tiny piece of me and my other half for the next eighteen+ years. I’m also more than ready to give up the “me, myself and I” life that I’ve been living over the past year. Until recently I lived alone, I slept alone, I went shopping alone, and I LOVED being alone. But as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I knew that I was ready to give it all up and start this new chapter of my life. Sure I was scared at first. Who wouldn’t be? I had a million and one thoughts running through my head when I first saw the little ‘+ 2-3 weeks’ sign on the test stick:
How am I going to do this? What will my friends and family think when I tell them? How am I going to tell them? What about work? Who will take care of my customers? Will there be an opportunity for me to return when my maternity leave is up?
There were SO MANY QUESTIONS that I was asking myself in the beginning that now seem so silly because in the end, those aren’t the things that matter. What matters is I’m healthy, the baby is healthy, my relationship with my boyfriend is healthy, and we are happy and ready to embrace this change and grow and learn and make mistakes together.
As I’m sure you’ve already figured out, this will be my last blog post for a while. Instead of drafting emails, making cold calls and attending conferences, my new focus is going to be changing diapers, keeping a clean house, catching up on sleep whenever I’m able to, and doing the best that I can to make my relationship with my boyfriend a priority even when it seems impossible. With that being said, I’d like to give a huge THANK YOU to everyone who’s taken the time to read my posts over the past two years!
In closing, I’d like to share a quote that I came across on Facebook a few days after I found out I was expecting. It struck a chord with me and has since become one of my favourites. It helped me realize that despite what anyone says about us being ‘too young’ or not being prepared or not realizing the shock that we’re in for, everything will be okay and turn out the way that it was always meant to:
“Being a young parent means we met a little early, but it also means I get to love you a little longer. Some people said their lives ended when they had children, but I know my life is just beginning. You didn’t take away my future; you gave me a new one.”